Regrets
by MalinMarie
Summary: It's the day of graduation, valedictorian Eddward Vincent is excited to finally be graduating. However, something happens that makes this day, that should be one of the best of his life, into a day riddled with questions and confusion. KevEdd, probably just a one-shot but we'll see.


I own nothing! All rights to their respective owners. Please enjoy, dearies.

Edd frowned, heaving a deep sigh and straightening the front of his graduation gown. It was the day he'd looked forward to since kindergarten, high school graduation. With honors, no less. His nerves were maddened and short circuiting, palms sweating. Eddy and Ed were ahead of him in line somewhere, probably wishing for the ceremony to be over sooner rather than later.

Despite the small size of Peach Creek High's 2008 graduating class, there was still quite a few children in front of Double D, all expressing emotions that ranged from nonchalant joy at the ending of the worst four years of their lives to immense sadness toward the ending of the most enjoyable years of their lives. None seemed quite as nervous as their valedictorian.

His anxiety increased ten fold as he heard his principal's voice silencing the milling crowd of parents and guardians.

In a poor attempt to distract himself as students were called to the stage to accept their diplomas, Double D began to think over his high school experience; regrets, fond memories, and the like. He had joined the science club, an activity he greatly enjoyed. Though, the rest of the team had never quite accepted their most enthusiastic, awkward member. It lessened when he became the captain, but he still never quite connected with them. He had joined the chess club. He had finished with a perfect GPA and ACT score.

The ravenet heard 'Ed Baker' come over the microphone and began to wring his hands. He made a point of thinking on his friends now, a continuous source of calm for him. Ed and Eddy had remained his friends and were even dearer to Edd than they were in middle school. Eddy had channeled his insistent scam obsession into a more productive interest in marketing. Ed had become quite the football player, his large stature and high tolerance for pain finally coming to decent use.

All in all, Double D's high school experience had been enriching and enjoyable. Aside from some incidents that Edd shuddered to think about pertaining to the more athletically inclined students finding his intelligence a flaw punishable by minor beatings and name calling.

"Kevin Barr."

Ah, now _there_ was one regret.

Kevin and the most introverted member of the Eds had never been vehemently hostile towards each other. Beyond their admittance into the same high school, the two hadn't really associated.

However, after a particularly awful beating during their sophomore year from a group of varsity baseball players, Kevin, being their captain, had stood up for Double D. As Edd laid, bloody and bruised, on the floor of the boys' varsity locker room, watching Kevin verbally scold his team mates in defense for the poor boy, Double D felt a burst of appreciation and something akin to affection in his chest.

For the next two and a half years, Edd had developed a deep seated crush on the red-headed jock. Every class they had together, every time they passed each other in the hall, every time Kevin defended Double D from the bullying that he seemed to be a magnet for, Edd fell a little more for him. He, of course, knew the feelings could never be reciprocated, despite the fact Kevin had practically become his bodyguard. He figured it was probably due to some form of guilt on Kevin's part for bullying the dork during their childhood.

Edd had never confessed his feelings to Kevin and it was his one regret.

After today, the two of them were going to be attending different colleges, moving on to entirely different lives and career paths. Double D had contemplated telling Kevin, considering they would never see each other again and the rejection would be easier to handle when the object of the emotional pain was not someone he saw everyday.

Alas, the nervous boy could never ever do something so outlandish and obviously doomed for devastation as confess to his long term social opposite. What was one regret in an otherwise fulfilling life?

"And, last but not least, your valedictorian, Eddward Vincent." Double D let out an unceremonious, effeminate squeak as he realized it was his turn to cross the stage.

Taking another deep breath, Edd stepped out from behind the heavy blue curtain, momentarily being blinded by the large spotlight pointed towards him. His classmates were all seated in the front rows of the auditorium, an immense amount of parents and the like settled behind them. Edd's eyes caught sight of a head of red-hair and high, freckled cheekbones and quickly turned away, gliding, surprisingly graceful, over to his balding principal. He accepted the diploma with a smile and took the man's place at the mahogany podium.

Double D had practiced his speech a hyperbolic amount of times and knew it was best for him to simply 'jump in'. That didn't stop the quiver in his voice nor the blush on his cheeks as he began.

"G-Greetings, friends and family, ladies and gentlemen, administrators and teachers. Before I get started, I would like to take a moment to thank all of you coming here tonight to honor your children and for giving me this opportunity to speak in front of you on this special occasion and to live my most remarkable aspiration in doing so."

"It seems like just yesterday that I was executing endeavors my best friends and I liked to call 'scams' for jawbreakers. I'm sure many of you have heard and found humor in our admittedly moronic adventures." There was a chorus of laughter and he felt confidence and encouragement fill him, continuing with more fervor. He had an itching worry that one of his bullies would attempt to ruin this ceremony with a prank but it was seeming to go well.

"As many of you know, I was accepted into Loyola University in Chicago on a full ride scholarship. Many of our fellow classmates have received similar scholarships. Nazz von Bartonschmeer was accepted into Chicago State University on a Presidential Scholarship. K-Kevin Barr," Edd faltered for a moment, clearing his throat and wringing his hands as discreetly as he could behind the podium. "-was accepted into the same college on a baseball scholarship. Jimmy Norman was accepted to University of California-Berkley on a agricultural scholarship. These are just a few of many. It is amazing to be a part of such a fantastic, brilliant graduating class and to be valedictorian of such a class no less. I am standing here in hopes of imparting upon you all this message." He made eye contact with Kevin at some point during this portion of his speech. The feel of those emerald eyes on him was unnerving and he struggled not to falter.

"Live your life from this point on with the idea that each day is an opportunity for self improvement, for self actualization. You are all something far greater than you may feel you are. Something important. Something meaningful. Something worthwhile. You are a person with the ability to make change, save lives, live to the fullest. Take nothing for granted. This life is one big adventure, so take it. And let others take theirs as well. Make good decisions—decisions that you can live with. You don't have to be a rockstar or a genius, a supermodel or a scientist." Kevin's eyes were still locked on him, despite Double D having broken the contact to scan the crowd a few times before checking to see if he was still being examined. He knew everyone else's eyes were on him as well, but, somehow, it seemed as if the red head's stare was different. Edd pushed on in his speech, stuttering slightly.

"A-As a c-class, we have been through more than we could have imagined in these past four years. Some more difficult to face than others. Yet we are sitting here for a reason. We are here because of our goals and dreams that have pushed us to accomplish all things. Look into the stands and to others around you, class of 2008. Every single person sitting here tonight sees something in you and believes that you will do great things in your lives. It doesn't matter what your plans are, or what you consider to be great things. Just remember that you _can_. You can try, you can fail, you can try again. Success isn't measured in dollar bills." Kevin was still examining Double D with such intensity that the boy's cheeks grew inflamed once again. Why on earth his long term crush was staring at him with a mixture of excessive concentration he could not possibly fathom but it was certainly unappreciated. The gaze was bringing him out of the confident stupor he had induced himself unto. He was becoming nervous again and there was a shake in his voice. However, this was the climax of his speech, he had to sound confident.

"No matter what path you choose to follow as you progress into your future, you will be the best that you can be. Not only am I excited to see what lies ahead, I know that the people sitting here today and the people that support you feel the same way about you."

"Let us make all those have supported and encouraged and stood by us thus far proud and give our lives everything that we have to give." Kevin's eyes were finally removed from his person and Double D felt as if he had just taken a breath of fresh air. His voice became smoother and he felt as if he added a certain amount of personal finesse as he finally came to the ending of his speech.

"Live with no regrets so that one day you may look back on your lives and smile." Edd gave a wide, gapped tooth grin, his eyes closing in relief. It seemed his speech had gone off without a hitch, as the phrase would be, and enthused the crowd. He smiled again, filled with pride.

"Congratulations, Class of 2008!" Double D said this final piece and was surprised as he was met with standing parents and even some standing students, all clapping and cheering.

Glancing at his principal for confirmation, Edd reached up and tossed his cap, which had previously been balancing precariously atop his ever present beanie into the air. The rest of his class followed, hugs and photos and festivities ensuing.

The ravenet made his way off of the stage, diploma nestled in his hands. He gripped it a little tight, a melancholy feeling in his stomach as he squeezed past huddles of laughing, crying, and congratulating parents and friends alike. His own parents had not been able to make it to the ceremony. Ed and Eddy were preoccupied with their own families. Eddy's brother had returned to see his younger sibling graduate and there was apparently much ado on that matter.

Thus, Double D had no reason to stay and no one to enjoy this immense moment in his life with. Besides, he had packing to do. He was due in Chicago shortly to begin an accelerated studies program. He had much to plan and much to look forward to that he logically could not allow himself to remain here, feeling sad for himself.

Edd made his way to one of the double doored exits of the auditorium, a brief glance over his shoulder at all the happy families. He caught sight once again of the redheaded jock he had been so plagued by. The boy was smiling up at a burly looking man and a petite woman, presumably his parental units, and rubbing the back of his neck in his characteristic way. There was a dust of pink over his freckled face as if his father had said something embarrassing.

Double D momentarily entertained the idea of finally telling Kevin the truth. However, as the other boy seemed to sense Double D's blue eyes on him, turning to look at the nerdy boy, he tossed the idea away. Edd quickly turned, stowing the longing feeling in his chest away as he always had.

He made his way down the quiet main hallway of Peach Creek High School one last time, his brand new silver Prius his parents had given him as a gradation gift sitting outside waiting for him. It was a nice metaphorical representation of Edd's new life which would be taking him away from all he had ever known. The nostalgia that filled the school was nearly palpable.

The musing boy suddenly heard the door he had just exited open, sounds of jubilance spilling out, followed by the sound of running footsteps. He ignored it, assumably just someone who was in desperate need of a restroom break after the extensive ceremony.

However, as he found himself being roughly grabbed by the shoulder and shoved into a locker, Edd realized that was not the case. There, in front of him, was Kevin, panting slightly through his nose, the pink Edd had seen earlier still present on his cheeks.

"S-Salutations, Kevin," Edd said, his face heating up instantaneously at being so close to the other boy. "Was there something I can hel-" Kevin interrupted him, placing his other hand on Double D's shoulder so that they were now squared off, eye to eye.

"All that stuff you just said about living without regrets and how," Kevin paused, seeming unsure of himself. "How we need to live life like everyday is an opportunity. It.. Well, you're right. And I'm going to take that advice. We'll probably never see each other after today and I just..." Edd blinked, confused, for a moment as the other boy trailed off.

"That's.. That's marvelous, Kevin. I am glad I could be so inspirational to you and that you sought me out to personally thank me." Kevin didn't respond, simply staring Double D down with what seemed to be a mixture of hesitation and conflict in his gem-like eyes. Edd let out a short, nervous chuckle, reaching up to grab Kevin's strong wrists and pull them from his shoulders. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really must be going." However, the appendages did not budge. "Kevin, please release-" He was once again cut off but this time for an entirely different reason.

Eddward stared with side, bewildered eyes as Kevin's warm, soft lips pressed against his own. Surely, he was dreaming this moment as he had a million times, albeit under different circumstances. Yet, as he felt the hands on his shoulders loosen and slide down and around his torso, dislodging his own hands from Kevin's wrists, he knew this must be real.

Whether it was real or not, didn't change the fact it was heavenly. Double D closed his eyes and nearly sighed as Kevin's lips began to move against his own. He felt something press against his lips with as much passion and presence as he was being pushed against the locker and made himself pliable. His lips parted and the taste of mint entered his mouth along with the slick, germ harboring muscle that was the redhead's intoxicating tongue. Edd ignored his instantaneous disgust at the thought, having dreamed of this moment for nearly the entirety of his high school career and not about to ruin it because of a few microscopic organisms.

The jock's scent filled his nose as he pushed against the leaner teen, their tongues intertwining. It was something cinnamon and spicy along with a scent that seemed to be musty and purely Kevin in nature. Double D attempted to catalogue every feeling, taste, scent, thought, and moment of the kiss that ended much too soon.

Before he knew what happened, Double D was standing in the hallway alone once again. He opened his eyes just as the door to the auditorium closed, taking Kevin with it. Where the other teen had once stood was a familiar worn, red baseball cap with a black bill, seemingly placed there out of nowhere. Edd looked down at it, unsure if what had just transpired was just a figment of his imagination.

As he bent down and tentatively picked up the hat, he knew it must have been real. He was more than confused and had the sudden urge to cry. His psyche made good on that that, tears pricking at the corner of his eyes as he suddenly felt an immense wave of loss. As if something important had just been wrenched from his grasp. He didn't understand the emotion but it didn't dull the pain which it had brought on.

Clutching the hat of his what-had-been-seemingly unattainable love interest tightly to his chest, the baffled and dazed boy made his way out into the parking lot. Edd unlocked his car and slid in, placing the hat next to him on the passenger seat. He stared, perplexed, at the steering wheel for a long moment, drying his tears as he did so. His fingers reached up on their own accord to touch his lips where he could still feel the ghost of Kevin's pressing against them.

Edd searched for an explanation for the events in his mind but found none. Kevin had said that it was the 'living with no regrets' portion of Edd's speech that had inspired him to do what he had just done, to.. to kiss Double D with such longing and intensity. He had also said they would probably never see each other after today. Some form of _carpe diem_ had clearly seized the jock but why? Edd's mind took the various pieces of jumbled information and attempted to put them together, but was unable to come up with a conclusion.

In the face of this, Eddward shook his head and started his car, putting it into reverse. He decided to store his questions and the memory, the feel, of the kiss away. He had too much ahead of him to be preoccupied and concerned with something that was clearly a fluke in the universe, a one time thing, simply the odd urges of a jock who was probably doing it as some form of graduation prank meant to confuse Double D or humiliate him.

At least, that was the lie the eighteen year old told himself as he stowed all these thoughts and the kiss away in a corner of his mind to where he also kept his love for the boy. That little part of his head where he kept his minute collection of regrets.

If they were, in fact, regrets.

Read and review, loves. I have an idea for this as a multiple chapter fanfiction but I am unsure. So, I may just leave this as a one shot.

Let me know what you think and if you would like more? Please and thank you.


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